The Loneliest Job I Ever Had Was in Leadership
Early in my career, I’ll admit I fell for the glamour of Leadership. We talk about influence, impact, and inspiring others like it’s a magic trick or just another Wednesday. But what we rarely talk about is how lonely it can feel—especially when you’re in the middle. Not quite frontline, but not quite executive.
Just… in between. Carrying the expectations from the top while trying to protect and motivate the team in front.
Before stepping into leadership, I thought it meant having more control, more say, more autonomy. But I quickly learned that leadership often means making hard decisions with limited options. It means being the translator between vision and execution. And it means having to hold space for everyone, while trying to figure things out yourself.
One of the loneliest stretches of my career was when I sat in mid-management. I wasn’t making the rules, but I was responsible for enforcing them. And when policies or priorities from the top didn’t align with the reality on the ground, I was the one tasked with bridging that gap. That’s a weight few people prepare you for so here are my notes:
The 3 Leadership (P’s): Push, Pause, Pivot
Leadership isn’t just about strategy—it’s about nuance. It’s about knowing when to push, when to pause, and when to pivot. You’re constantly asking:
How do I motivate a team and prevent burning out?
How do I deliver feedback that’s honest, but not harmful, and delivers results?
How do I advocate for my people while still delivering what leadership wants?
Sometimes the “hard conversations” aren’t about major conflicts. Sometimes they sound like:
“Hey, I’ve noticed your input isn’t quite aligning with the team’s pace. Is everything okay?”
or
“I need to be honest—my expectations for your role aren’t being met right now, and I want to talk about what support you need moving forward.”
Conversations that require you to balance support with accountability can feel small on the outside—but internally, they carry big impact.
Leading Without Applause
You won’t always get credit. You won’t always be understood. And that’s okay. Great leaders are not liked, they are loved because they recognize that the success of the team and the individuals on it are greater than one single person’s accomplishment.
Leadership can be lonely, but it can also be one of the most meaningful roles you ever step into.
If leading right now feels lonely just remember—
You’re not alone, and you’re not doing it wrong.
And if you need a reminder, here are a few:
You don’t have to have all the answers.
You can be firm and empathetic.
And most of all, you deserve community and support, too.
Whether you're leading your first team or navigating the demands of a growing organization, connect with us online for leadership insights—or book a 1:1 session to get tailored support.
